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Have you heard about the latest craze

Thats sweepin across the nation

All the punks from coast to coast

Have discovered an old invention:

"your hairs too long

Man, youre a queer

Youre too new wave

Put down that beer"

And

Do the slaglook at em run

Do the slaghey you scum

Do the slagaint it fun

Do the slaglets all be dumb

Badmouth people we dont know

Make sure its behind their backs

Dont let new people in our scene

Its more fun than having a friend

Well slag everyone each and every night

So we can pretend that were all right

Make those pricks feel just so small

Well show the world that were three feet tall

Slander their integrity

Doubt their humanity

Talk about their haircuts

Are their politics correct?

Do the slag!

Dont let those sissies on the floor

Theyre unhip, man, they bought the wrong clothes

Lets all do the latest craze

cause having allies never pays

Well slag everyone each and every night

So we can pretend that were all right

Make those pricks feel just so small

Well show the world that were three feet tall